{"id":157,"date":"2011-01-21T12:18:00","date_gmt":"2011-01-21T12:18:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.astarmathsandphysics.com\/tutor_profiles\/paul_smith\/paul_smiths_blog\/?p=157"},"modified":"2011-01-21T12:18:00","modified_gmt":"2011-01-21T12:18:00","slug":"british-shadow-chancellor-buggered-by-the-police","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/2011\/01\/british-shadow-chancellor-buggered-by-the-police\/","title":{"rendered":"British Shadow Chancellor Buggered by the Police"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>As good as. His wife was having an affair with the dumb plod meant to protect them. Given the failure of this particular method of protection, I hope they tried something more reliable than the British police while they were at it.<\/p>\n<p>Like a condom.<\/p>\n<p>The shadow chancellor &#8211; who incidentally was once a postman and probably no stranger to taking breaks for &#8216;quickies&#8217; with the lonely housewives on his round &#8211; has now resigned for &#8216;family reasons&#8217;.<\/p>\n<p>Just one in a string of sex scandals for the police. Undercover officers have been having affairs with the &#8216;terrorists&#8217; ie green campaigners and ordinary plods have been sent to jail for raping suspects in police cells&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>I have a solution. Only castrati shall be allowed to work in the police force. Given the cuts being made in the police budget, it would have the advantage that we could replace police sirens with the high pitched wail of police officers in no danger of jumping into bed with members of the public.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>As good as. His wife was having an affair with the dumb plod meant to protect them. Given the failure of this particular method of protection, I hope they tried something more reliable than the British police while they were &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/2011\/01\/british-shadow-chancellor-buggered-by-the-police\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-157","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3Wm4j-2x","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":537,"url":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/2012\/02\/will-the-british-police-give-me-a-car\/","url_meta":{"origin":157,"position":0},"title":"Will the British police give me a car?","author":"taxicle","date":"February 28, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"If Rebecca Brooks, corrupt ex newspaper editor can have a police horse, can I have a police car? If you haven't any cars, can I have a helicopter or a police launch? If you don't have any of these can you saddle up one of your dumb plods to carry\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1051,"url":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/2012\/12\/fight-fight-fight\/","url_meta":{"origin":157,"position":1},"title":"FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!","author":"taxicle","date":"December 23, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"The tory party and the British police are squaring up for a fight it seems, with each accusing the other of being a bunch of thieving, lying spivs out to stitch each other and the British people up for as much money as possible. This thing could take years if\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":707,"url":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/2012\/09\/british-police-guilty-of-wholesale-murder-and-lies\/","url_meta":{"origin":157,"position":2},"title":"British Police Guilty of Wholesale Murder and Lies","author":"taxicle","date":"September 12, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Not content with being stupid and incompetent, the British police have been found to have framed 96 Liverpool football fans, making it appear they all killed themselves, like a buch of lemmings. To do this, they beat up witnesses, made up evidence, bribed the local press. Now they have been\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":299,"url":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/2011\/08\/uk-police-so-eager-to-murder-they-kill-a-man-before-he-kills-himself\/","url_meta":{"origin":157,"position":3},"title":"UK Police so Eager to Murder they Kill Another Man Before He Kills Himself","author":"taxicle","date":"August 24, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"When a man decided to commit suicide by stabbing himself in the stomach, British police decided to take no chance with their reputation for inflicting a state of death on anyone they don't like. They tasered, pepper sprayed and beat him up until there was no doubt he was dead\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":364,"url":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/2011\/10\/london-police-lie-wholesale-in-court\/","url_meta":{"origin":157,"position":4},"title":"London Police Lie Wholesale in Court","author":"taxicle","date":"October 20, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"British police, long known to be among the stupidest pieces of dumbshits in the world have amazed us again with their ignorance of the law. Apparently they think, the courts are there so the police can send along false witnesses to give false statements and anybody who is giving them\u2026","rel":"","context":"With 2 comments","block_context":{"text":"With 2 comments","link":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/2011\/10\/london-police-lie-wholesale-in-court\/#comments"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":797,"url":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/2012\/10\/british-chancellor-caught-without-a-ticket-on-a-train\/","url_meta":{"origin":157,"position":5},"title":"British Chancellor Caught Without a Ticket on a Train","author":"taxicle","date":"October 21, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Actually he was caught with a second class ticket in a first class carriage. Stupidly he tried to bluff and argue his way out, and refused to move to second class or pay up, eventually having to pay up. It would have been better i think if he had asked,\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/157","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=157"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/157\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=157"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=157"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/astarmathsandphysics.com\/blog\/paulsmith\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=157"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}