Please Don’t Come to England Next Year for the Olympics

We don’t want you here, speeding past us in your special olympic lanes and crowding us off the trains. If you ignore this you will find Londoners mad at not being able to go anywhere in the east end for the traffic jams and tourists. Please stay in your own country next year or go somewhere else and ignore Britain altogether.
And please don’t come if you want to meet any Londoners. Many of us are sick of the olympics and will be somewhere else – possibly in your country. You may come back to find all the sand or grass or water or whatever has been stolen!
WE DON’T WANT YOU HERE NEXT YEAR!