Brace Yourself!

This weekend a couple of scruffy characters walked into a petrol station while I waited at the counter and stuffed sandwiches into a bag before running away.
Not much of a payoff for the risk they took.

An Orson Welles film I haven’t seen before – A Safe Place, directed by Henry Jaglom.

It only takes half a percent of the inhabitants of a country to be dedicated to its destruction to make it ungovernable. In the UK we know this well from Northern Ireland. In Afghanistan it is the Taliban, and when the Taliban are in power it will be the Northern League. In Ukraine it is the protesters in Kiev, and when they are in power it will be the pro – Russians.

There is a real danger your opponent might box your brain into your bum, the everytime you sit on it you are squeezing it into an ever smaller space, until eventually it pops and disappears.

Ed milliband is full of crap. There is no cost of living crisis. There is only a crisis of expectations because people expect too much, like anyone who finds themselves unemployed when they thought they had a job for life.

So when at home your mobile calls are routed through your home phone if your mobile can’t pick up a signal?

To check I’m not texting our cat how much I love her.

While everyone is praising Mandela the terrorist, why don’t any of the victims of the bombings perpetrated by the ANC appear on tv to condemn all the razzmatazz and hero worship?

Paul tied a plate with his lunch around his neck.

The south pole is so far away and anyway there are no strippers waiting there for me and I’ve run out of whisky and cigarettes.
Can you ask my mum to send a helicopter to drop me some?