Brace Yourself!

and facebook and made a facebook business page.
Yesterday I had 2800 unique visitors to my website – a real thrill.

Came to publish me first app on the iPhone then saw it would cost me $100

The government has announced that January A level module exams are no more and that A level students will only be able to retake module exams once, in June. This is a disaster for the private tuition trade and private tutors all over the country will now have to sell the big issue at xmas else end up in the workhouse.
When you walk past a big issue seller this xmas, please buy a copy. The seller might be a private tutor suffering from the governments insane policies, JUST LIKE YOU!

An energy advisor came to our house last week and gave us an energy use monitor so we can see at a stroke how much energy we are using at any time. Switch something on or off and your enrgy use goes up or down instantly. It’s making me very self conscious and an even greener consumer than I was. Already I have installed spray taps and infra red plugs to switch those standby things off at night. I am already in the habit of switching off the lights as I leave a room and am using a table top flask to reduce the number of kettles I have to boil.

Anybody who listens to Radio 4 must have noticed how the Archers soap opera is seeking to reprogram your mind with pointless businesspeak and sentimental letsallcareforeachother crap.
We the dontgiveashit British people must turn off the radio whenever we hear the Archers themetune so all they succeed in reprogramming, possibly, are the monitors at Iran world monitoring who are forced to listen to it.

The first island ever to be undiscovered has been… undiscovered.
Somewhere in the niddle of nowhere, shown on the map below, the first undiscovered island has apparently been found, or maybe unfound.
See if you can find it.

If you find it, email me. I feel the need to be King of somewhere and I can’t imagine anywhere better than the first undiscovered island in the world.

Some ukrainian schoolkid I think, cos I spotted it right away, and the hackers website was anyway closed down today – a few hours into the hack. If your host is competent – like mine, hostmonster – I just love ’em – they will take daily backups, so if you spot it early you can simply restore the files which were changed during the hack with a single click.

After delivering my new phone weeks late, taking months at a time to repair it, losing it and giving me a spare phone cos my phone broke down 4 times in 8 months, then telling me I would have to pay to repair it cos it only had a one year warranty (even though they never told me ,and the contract was for two years, and a two year warranty is normal on a two year contract), they have just delivered me a new replacement phone, with a letter that says, ‘FREE!”.
Then I got this email

Hi Paul

Thanks for contacting Three.

I’m sorry to read you’ve had issues with repairing your HTC Desire HD.

You were previously advised on Twitter that all phones have a 24 month warranty apart from Apple products, I’m afraid this doesn’t include refurbished phones. The HTC Desire HD you are querying is showing as refurbished.

You’ve stated in your notes that you were made unaware that your phone was refurbished. I’ve checked your notes and can see you originally upgraded to the HTC Desire HD on 04/04/2011 at £35.00 per month. Something then went wrong with your order and the upgrade was cancelled. on 15/04/2011 you upgraded again, however this time it was to a HTC Desire HD Refurb with your line rental being £23.00. When confirming an upgrade we are required to tell you specific information about your contract and price plan. You would have been informed that your new deal included a refurbished phone. However the warranty may not have been mentioned as it is not part of our General Conditions 23 script which is regulated by Ofcom.

Due to the phone having numerous faults, we offered you a Samsung Galaxy Europa at the discounted price of £49.99 which you purchased on 10/08/2011. This is now the registered phone on your account. This phone has a 24m warranty which runs from 10/08/2011 onwards.

I can see on your account that you had sent your phone for repair and didn’t receive the back cover. Our repairs centre sent one out on 20/11/2012, this will be with you in 2-3 working days.

I hope this clears things up for you.

Thanks.

My reply:
No it doesn’t actually. I knew it was a refurbished phone. What I didn’t know was that it was only a one year warranty, because your sales people never told me. Further, I have a letter from you telling me the replacement phone is free and look forward not to being charged anything more in this matter.

Ever wished you were the person above you in the phone book?
They probably live a much more interesting life than you.
If anyone out there called paul smith would like to be me for a day, give me a call. While you are me I will go sailing.
Of course, being me means you have to pay all my bills and fixing things that needs to be done around here.
Thanks very much.

Three the awful phone company have folded.
After telling me I would have to pay for my phone to be repaired, they have conceded everything and sent me a free new phone identical to my old one.
This is the second replacement phone they have sent me. I feel like a victory parade down Whitehall.